Okay, you “tried”, and it didn’t work. But, at least you said you “tried”. Do you feel relieved now… even though you failed?
Is it good enough to “try” to do something… and then quit?
People who use words like “I tried.” are quitting before they give themselves a chance to win. When you say “I tried” or “I can’t,” the computer in your brain steps right up and supplies you with lots of reasons why you can’t, and it also blocks the creative part of your mind from figuring our how you can. Thus, the fact that you can’t, becomes true, further reinforcing your belief that you really can’t.
The entire presupposition behind “I tried” is failure. No one who succeeds ever says “I tried.” They say “I will do it.”
Trying begins with the belief in failure. To try, you must make pictures in your head of failing. My suggestion is to make pictures in your head of accomplishing whatever it is you want to accomplish. Picture yourself having lost weight, as a non-smoker, or marching in the Winners’ Parade. When you do this, you give your brain a signal to figure out how to do it. When you “try,” you give your brain a signal to figure out a way to fail. There’s always a way.
In the 1st of the Star Wars episodes, Yoda instructed Luke Sky Walker (Harrison Ford), “There is no ‘try’. There is either ‘do’ or ‘do not.”
Instead of saying “I can’t”, begin to ask “How can I?” and keep asking and asking until your brain supplies you with the answer you want. I once heard a “motivational speaker” say, “After you think you tried every possible method, and still haven’t succeeded, try another method.” You could have asked Thomas Alva Edison about that:
“If I find 10,000 ways something won’t work, I haven’t failed. I am not discouraged, because every wrong attempt discarded is another step forward.”
Thomas Alva Edison (1847 – 1931)
“Genius is 1 percent inspiration, 99 percent perspiration.”
Why would someone focus on what they don’t want, and see themselves as being “at effect” of causes over which they have no control? Fear. You can take control of your responses to whatever situation you find yourself in. And you can consciously control the choices you have in any situation. Choose to be successful.
What is the common thread of greatness that binds Thomas Edison, Yogi Berra, Yoda, and Gen. George S. Patton… and Mothers?
The power to persist in spite of everything, to endure, is the quality of a winner. Your greatest glory is not in never failing, but in rising every time you fail. “I don’t fear failure. I only fear the slowing up of the engine inside of me which is saying, ‘Keep going, someone must be on top, why not you?”
― George S. Patton Jr.
“IT’S NEVER OVER UNTIL IT’S OVER.” –Yogi Berra
My own dear mother, who came to the New World (Philadelphia), as a penniless but determined immigrant from Russia, always believed she could accomplish nearly anything here. She learned English quickly, spoke it without an accent, and was respected and loved by everyone who met her. Her goals were to raise two children in a most difficult time during the “Great Depression”. Somehow she found the money to buy a piano for my sister, who became an opera singer, and for me to learn the violin. I can only imagine the hardships and the barriers in those years. Perseverentia vincit. (Perseverance conquers.) My mom, like yours, had all those adages; “Where there’s a will there’s a way.” ‘If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again,”.
Your constant and determined effort will eventually break down all resistance and sweep away all the barriers to help you reach your goal. Be positive and persistent; know you will accomplish it.
You can’t be happy knowing you only “tried” …. and lost, and knowing that winning was just within your reach.